It all started when Steve Harris, a Life Coach turned relationship coach, posted a video on his Instagram account.
There, he admonished young accomplished women aged 30-40 years.
That video has given rise to the discourse for the week.
Soon after I chanced upon a picture on Facebook of beautiful Rihanna, the billionaire award winning singer, beauty entrepreneur. She gorgeously rocked her baby bump in sunny California. She had stepped out for an event with her 2 sons, mum and bodyguard.
Then I mused that if a billionaire with diverse portfolios such as Rihanna could settle down with a fellow artist not as wealthy or well known like her, what’s stopping our own ‘crayfish millionaires’ from settling down.
If billionaire Hollywood A list actresses and producers such as Lindsay Lohan, Zoe Saldana, Julia Roberts could settle down with regular guys.
If billionaire tennis star, Serena Williams, could settle down and have children. What’s up with our homegrown ladies?
I found that here in Africa, especially Nigeria, some young women working in top jobs or running small scale enterprises, earning decent income are ignorantly delaying their marital settlements.
Sometimes through harbouring unrealistic expectations from their potential suitors. Sometimes through foolishness and wokery.
This is what we will unpack this week on Women’s Hub with real life stories. Names and locations have been changed to protect identities.
Take the case of Kate, 39, a successful consultant/event planner earning commissions in millions. She owns a cushy condo in an affluent suburb in Abuja.
Asked why she’s still single and searching, she answered waving her manicured fingers and Brazilian hair that she can’t date broke ass men. As a rich girl it’s proper that she can only date and marry men richer than her.
Take the case of a successful film producer, a single mother at 45. She publicly declared in a podcast that she’s ready for re-marriage with a partner richer than her.
Take the case of a 35 year old billionaire’s daughter after two failed public engagements. She declared on social media that she’s now in talking stages with potential suitors.
Yet she can’t boil ordinary rice without checking YouTube video.
As a Relationship Coach myself, I totally align my thoughts with coaches like Steve Harris and others that these ladies are certainly living in lala land.
They are delusional, unrealistic and needlessly self sabotaging themselves.
Unless they change their ways, they will still be searching till 45. By then it will be too late or they could take the following suggestions for free. It’s really up to them:
- Shred totally that your spec list: he must be tall, rich, 6 pack, my tribe, Christian, Muslim, etc
- Be open to other people: stop restricting yourself from some groups.
- Be flexible: stop being uptight, controlling and one way person
- Be intentional: take correction, work on yourself, values and character
- Reduce your professional pride: so you are good at your job, are you also good at relationships
- Be friendly: do you have empathy, are you even caring
- Be prepared: are you ready to share your life with someone else
- Be business minded. Hire a relationship coach, seek matchmaking options.
Please tag your nieces, cousins, sisters, colleagues and neighbors that belong to this age range to change their ways.
Please join this conversation by sending your comments and feedback to mooborscounsellingroom@gmail.com
By Mubo Okosun
Women’s Editor
